Helpful Practices for Parent Communication
Strong school-family partnerships lead to healthy classrooms and high-achieving students!
“When it goes well, a parent call can be a transformative moment in your relationship with the student, and by extension in your classroom.”
The research is clear: school-parent partnerships benefit our students. For example, this 2017 review of literature found, “there is a demonstrable connection between family engagement, school improvement, and student outcomes”. The review continues to outline the wide body of research going back at least 3 decades demonstrating the correlation between strong home-school partnerships and student achievement. This 2015 action research project found a positive correlation between family involvement and 4th grade standardized testing results. Something as simple as a once weekly, one-sentence text to parents resulted in higher pass rates for credit recovery students in this 2015 study. The benefits are consistent across socio-economic groups, cultures, and grade levels. (see these studies of inner-city students, Latino students, and hearing-impared students as just a sample of the many similar studies.
Communicating with parents, therefore, cannot be an afterthought in our classrooms. It must be a central component of our instructional practice.
In part one and part two of this blog, I shared some tips for preparing and making challenging parent phone calls. Today, I’d like to share a few more helpful tips for effective communication with home.
Helpful practices
Make positive phone calls
If speaking with parents intimidates you, positive phone calls are a wonderful place to start. Make calls home for those kids in your class who are working hard, doing their best, and showing kindness to their peers. Be sure to start by stating your name, school, and “I’m calling with good news for Kenneth’s parent.” Then, share specific compliments about the child. I like to end with, “And so, if there’s any special treat Kenneth would enjoy this weekend, he’s certainly earned it!”
You will be blown away at the response. Parents LOVE this. I have had parents tell me years later how much this meant to them, and how unusual it is. The fact is, most of our kids are doing what they should, and those parents rarely if ever receive teacher contact.
Set aside 20 minutes after school every Friday and end your week this way. It will send you home with joy in your heart and will make your students’ weekend. It’s also good practice to just get in the habit of picking up the phone and calling home.
I always have my student teachers make positive parent calls, for all the reasons listed above. Pick up the phone. Do it.
If a phone number doesn’t work, try try again.
I learned this pointer from my assistant principal, Mr. McConico. If the first or second contact on a student’s list doesn’t work, call the emergency contacts. Call their grandma, their aunt, or their neighbor. Find an adult in that child’s life to connect with. Don’t give up.
First, the person you reach may have the parent’s number. This allows you to help update the school database.
Second, the message will get through to the parent. It will have impact coming from a secondary contact - potentially more than if you delivered it yourself.
Third, the student will be shocked, and news will get around as they tell their friends, “Mrs. Bartels called my auntie!”
“It makes my life easier when I know teachers have clear, measurable rules, that they’ve spoken to the student and they’ve communicated with the parents. Then I can make the conversation about the student’s behavior. ”
Finally, if you can’t get hold of anybody, let your administrator know. This is truly a safety issue.
We have to let kids know that we are willing to go as far as it takes to get them the help they need. Deep down, the student will be grateful someone cares enough to not quit.
Make calls from school
Yes, you can dial *67 to block your number, but a lot of people won’t answer the call. They will usually answer a call from the school. If your school’s phone system is onerous, as mine is, get a lesson from your front office staff and write yourself a tutorial. You have a college degree, you can figure out the phone system.
I also like the personal boundary of not making school calls from home in the evening. It’s good to get it off your plate before you leave for the day.
Cultivate a network of colleagues who will translate for you.
Most schools have a system to request translators to make phone calls, but this takes time and paperwork that delays important parent contact.
If possible, find colleagues who can help you make quick phone calls home. There are some students who will exploit the language barrier between home and school. Break down this barrier.
If you have no other options, write using a translation app.
Written texts through through Google Translate, ChatGPT, or other translator apps isn’t ideal - but it’s better than not trying.
Have the student present when you call.
This is one of my favorite techniques. Hold the misbehaving student after class and tell them, “We’re going to call your mom right now.”
Often, the student obfuscates. “My mom’s at work and she can’t take the call.” I’ll reply, “OK, well let’s try, and if she can’t talk right now I’ll talk to her later on my own.” 90% of the time, the kid is bluffing.
So then I call and say something like, “This is Lisa Bartels from x School. I’m Annie’s French teacher. I’m here with Annie, and we had some problems in class today. I’m going to put Annie on the phone to explain to you, and then I’d like to talk to you.” Then hand the phone to the student and let her explain to mom what she did. I let the parent and child talk for a few minutes. If the student leaves anything out, I prompt them, “Tell her about the bag of chips.” or “Tell her what you did when Micah took your pencil.” When parent and child are done conversing, I speak to the parent.
This doesn’t always work out, and I caution you to never do it when you’re angry. (I did once, and it was a big mistake which I’ll write about sometime!) You must be neutral and professional. When you receive the phone back, your role is to express concern and a path forward. “Thank you for talking with Annie. I know she is smart and is a leader in our classroom. She’s capable of more than I saw in class today. Tomorrow I’m looking forward to seeing x,y,z from her. Thank you for your time, and you have a good afternoon.
I’ve literally had tough, belligerent kids break down and sob during this type of call, followed by me hugging them and offering a fresh start tomorrow. The kids aren’t used to being held accountable in this way. When they are removed from their audience and made to report their behavior to their parent in front of me, the student’s reaction is often immediate remorse.
When it goes well, this can be a transformative moment in your relationship with the student, and by extension in your classroom.
Regular parent contact helps you establish credibility with your administration.
A brilliant administrator (who is also my husband) told me, “It makes my life easier when I know teachers have clear, measurable rules, that they’ve spoken to the student and they’ve communicated with the parents about a problem. So, when it comes to me, I have that basis to start from and I can make the conversation about the student’s behavior.
If it comes to me as an emotionally charged write-up, I have to find out more details before I can act. When I talk to the kid in this circumstances, I usually get a tirade about how awful the teacher is and how the teacher has it out for them.
Like it or not, if I have a teacher who rarely sends me something and then they send me a write up with documentation, I can go to the kid and say, “This is the first write-up I’ve gotten from Mrs. X all semester. Your behavior was really out of line.”
It takes a village
Education is a partnership between teacher, child, and parent. When working together, it’s a powerful combination. If calling parents is daunting for you, reviewing your classroom management plan might be a good step. Click here for 18 steps to take when your class is awful!
What’s your favorite tip for calling parents? Share in the chat!
